Hold Me Tight® Couples Workshops
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Good Intentions, Bad Results
A line from a poem by Robert Burns says, “The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.” Indeed, good intentions, even the best intentions sometimes produce bad results. And perhaps that is most true in relationships. When couples struggle, when they feel distant and distressed, it’s sad but true that often, the very things they try to fix it only end up making it worse. Some try to "get through" to their partner, but it only comes out as accusation, blame, interrogation or attack. Others try to "keep the peace," but it only looks to their partner like they have shut down and don't care. The more one does one thing, the more the other does the other thing. And they both seem like opponents, if not enemies to the other.
Few people, if any, wake up thinking, “How can I mess up my relationship or make my partner miserable?” Yet, by then end of the day, our partner is convinced that’s exactly what we had in mind.
Why do our good intentions in love often go so bad? Why do we seem to hurt most the one we love? What is going on when we escalate (or isolate) and end up miles apart from the one we most want to be close to? Why is love so confounding? Those are million dollar questions. It feels helpless when what you try either doesn’t work or makes things worse.
But, here’s good news: love is actually not as crazy as you might think. Years of research in the new science of attachment have taught us that indeed, love makes exquisite sense. It is logical and rational. We now understand what seems so strange when our good intentions in love go so wrong.
That is what you will learn in a Hold Me Tight®️ couples weekend workshop—plus a whole lot more. A HMT®️ workshop is two days of learning alongside other couples facing the same struggles and challenges as you. Find out what makes love, what breaks love and how to create a safe, dependable bond with your partner that will last a lifetime.
A HMT®️ workshop is not therapy. It’s a low key, fun way to grow closer to your partner, share important conversations and create a strong, resilient connection you never knew you could have.
Try something that has changed the game for thousands of couples around the world. Get in on the next Hold Me Tight®️ workshop. Sign up today!
Have a Safety Plan
A Hold Me Tight retreat in Orlando is a safe, powerful experience for couples to grow closer together
At Hold Me Tight, couples learn to let go of old baggage.
As I write this, I am waiting in my dermatologist’s office to have minor surgery. He detected a small spot of skin cancer on my face. That’s always a potential problem here in sunny Florida. Fortunately, they caught mine early and the procedure to correct it should be fairly simple. They found my skin cancer in a routine exam. That is to say, I had no symptoms. It wasn’t visible, wasn’t conspicuous, or even noticeable. But, had I ignored it, it most definitely would have worsened and possibly become serious. As they say, prevention beats treatment. And even when treatment is required, the earlier, the better.
Couples at a Hold Me Tight retreat in Orlando change their perspective and their behaviors to grow closer than ever before.
A Hold Me Tight®️ retreat is a transformational learning experience for couples. Two words there are key: learning and experience. First, what do you learn? You learn fascinating insights from attachment science. You learn that emotions are what drive us. Think about it: the word “emotion” contains the word “motion.” Emotions move us, motivate us. Emotions incite behaviors, actions and reactions. Emotions inform every level of our existence. And our most powerful, most vulnerable emotions are beneath the surface.
A Hold Me Tight couples retreat in Orlando will prepare couples for managing conflict and discord.
A Hold Me Tight couples retreat in Orlando can help couples change their focus on their relationship.
I recently decided I need to get in shape. I've "let myself go" for too long. Fortunately, there is no shortage of good home based video programs for resistance training, flexibility or cardio health. So, I perused the internet and found one of each. (I’m going for the total makeover!) I ordered them and when they arrived, I was excited to start my fitness journey. Some of them told me I could get in shape in “just a few minutes a day.” How hard could that be? I was all in. Let’s do this! So, I turned on the TV, queued the video, sat down on the couch and hit “Play.” I even popped some popcorn and got my favorite soda. I watched the first episode and, because I was really into it, watched a second session just for good measure. The next day, I did the same thing…sat right there on the couch and watched my fitness video. In fact, I watched every day for the next two weeks. I sat there faithfully and never missed an episode. After all, consistency is key, right? I couldn’t wait to look like those incredible people on the videos: slim, tight, perfectly toned—man, what bodies! But, something didn’t work. So far, I haven’t lost a pound. My waistline is just as big (maybe even a little bigger). I’m just as puffy and lumpy as ever. I’ll never get in shape. I don’t get it. I watched, I listened, I paid attention. What the heck? I want my money back! Okay, back to reality.
In this blog, I’d just like to share a few reflections on our most recent Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat. As always, it was nothing sort of amazing. No two retreats are the same, but they never fail to amaze Vicki and me. Last weekend, we welcomed eight couples to our Winter Park (Orlando) FL venue. That is a little smaller group than usual, but it only makes for a warmer experience. It’s always exciting to meet new couples for the first time, to hear their stories and what brought them our way. The couples in this retreat varied in age and number of years together, from 4 years to about 40 years. It was clear that some were very stuck, unsure that they could figure out their relationship, but willing to try. Others were happy together, but wanted to make their good thing even better. Later, we learned that at least one couple saw the Hold Me Tight®️ retreat as sort of a “last best hope” before throwing in the towel on their marriage. You wouldn’t have guessed it to look at them, but they weren’t the first such couple to come to a Hold Me Tight®️ retreat as a last resort.