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Time for a Change

I recently decided I need to get in shape. I've "let myself go" for too long. Fortunately, there is no shortage of good home based video programs for resistance training, flexibility or cardio health. So, I perused the internet and found one of each. (I’m going for the total makeover!) I ordered them and when they arrived, I was excited to start my fitness journey. Some of them told me I could get in shape in “just a few minutes a day.” How hard could that be? I was all in. Let’s do this!

So, I turned on the TV, queued the video, sat down on the couch and hit “Play.” I even popped some popcorn and got my favorite soda. I watched the first episode and, because I was really into it, watched a second session just for good measure. The next day, I did the same thing…sat right there on the couch and watched my fitness video. In fact, I watched every day for the next two weeks. I sat there faithfully and never missed an episode. After all, consistency is key, right? I couldn’t wait to look like those incredible people on the videos: slim, tight, perfectly toned—man, what bodies!

But, something didn’t work. So far, I haven’t lost a pound. My waistline is just as big (maybe even a little bigger). I’m just as puffy and lumpy as ever. I’ll never get in shape. I don’t get it. I watched, I listened, I paid attention. What the heck? I want my money back!

Okay, back to reality.

It's More than Information

You get the point and it’s pretty obvious: change never comes by simply learning new moves, studying new moves, talking about new moves, thinking about new moves or watching others do the moves. It only comes by DOING the moves, doing them yourself, over and over, creating new habits and mastering them. 


Doing what I described above to get in shape is laughable. No one would do that. But, with relationships, we make those foolish mistakes all the time. We decide our relationship needs help, needs work. It’s not in good shape. So, we read books, we attend lectures and workshops and listen to experts tell us how to change our love life. We learn about “fighting fair” or negotiating a better deal with our partner. We take notes and talk ad nauseam ABOUT a better relationship. But, too often, we don’t (and don’t know how to) actually practice the new skills. So, we stay stuck—and then blame our self for one more attempt that failed.

Hold Me Tight is Different

That’s why I’m sold on Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreats. At Hold Me Tight®️, couples learn a lot, to be sure. They learn about the science of love. They learn about what all humans seek and need—a safe emotional connection. They learn how and why couples get stuck in the same cycles of conflict and disconnection. But it doesn’t stop with learning. They don’t just sit and take it in. Hold Me Tight®️ is about learning AND doing.


At a Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat, couples actually “get off the couch.” They actually practice new conversations, new ways to connect more deeply and safely than ever before. They learn to have conversations, not confrontations. They have these conversations in real time, but they do it privately. It’s safe. Workshop leaders are there to help is anyone gets stuck. Couples go at their own pace. No one gets put on the spot. Hold Me Tight®️ couples don’t just learn about new skills. They actually do them. And that makes all the difference. Each conversation builds on the ones before and couples go gradually deeper into vulnerability and empathy, the two skills can change a relationship forever. 

Big Changes Can Happen Quickly

Hold Me Tight®️ is not miracle work and we don’t do rebuilds in just two days. But we do help couples see a way forward. They often leave confident that they can connect because they’ve actually done it, right there, in real time. And sometimes, that really does feel like a miracle. 


But, don’t take my word for it. Find out for yourself. Learn all about Hold Me Tight®️ at www.couplesworkshopsofflorida.com. Getting your relationship in shape is a great idea. A Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat in Orlando will help you make it happen!


Have a Safety Plan

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Change Your Viewing--Change Your Doing

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A Real Learning Experience

By Mark Beck • October 9, 2024
A Hold Me Tight®️ retreat is a transformational learning experience for couples. Two words there are key: learning and experience. First, what do you learn? You learn fascinating insights from attachment science. You learn that emotions are what drive us. Think about it: the word “emotion” contains the word “motion.” Emotions move us, motivate us. Emotions incite behaviors, actions and reactions. Emotions inform every level of our existence. And our most powerful, most vulnerable emotions are beneath the surface.
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Preparation is Priceless

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Two Rules for Living (and Loving)

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I Gotta Get in Shape

By Mark Beck • August 28, 2024
I recently decided I need to get in shape. I've "let myself go" for too long. Fortunately, there is no shortage of good home based video programs for resistance training, flexibility or cardio health. So, I perused the internet and found one of each. (I’m going for the total makeover!) I ordered them and when they arrived, I was excited to start my fitness journey. Some of them told me I could get in shape in “just a few minutes a day.” How hard could that be? I was all in. Let’s do this! So, I turned on the TV, queued the video, sat down on the couch and hit “Play.” I even popped some popcorn and got my favorite soda. I watched the first episode and, because I was really into it, watched a second session just for good measure. The next day, I did the same thing…sat right there on the couch and watched my fitness video. In fact, I watched every day for the next two weeks. I sat there faithfully and never missed an episode. After all, consistency is key, right? I couldn’t wait to look like those incredible people on the videos: slim, tight, perfectly toned—man, what bodies! But, something didn’t work. So far, I haven’t lost a pound. My waistline is just as big (maybe even a little bigger). I’m just as puffy and lumpy as ever. I’ll never get in shape. I don’t get it. I watched, I listened, I paid attention. What the heck? I want my money back! Okay, back to reality.

Reflections on a Hold Me Tight Couples Retreat

By Mark Beck • August 21, 2024
In this blog, I’d just like to share a few reflections on our most recent Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat. As always, it was nothing sort of amazing. No two retreats are the same, but they never fail to amaze Vicki and me. Last weekend, we welcomed eight couples to our Winter Park (Orlando) FL venue. That is a little smaller group than usual, but it only makes for a warmer experience. It’s always exciting to meet new couples for the first time, to hear their stories and what brought them our way. The couples in this retreat varied in age and number of years together, from 4 years to about 40 years. It was clear that some were very stuck, unsure that they could figure out their relationship, but willing to try. Others were happy together, but wanted to make their good thing even better. Later, we learned that at least one couple saw the Hold Me Tight®️ retreat as sort of a “last best hope” before throwing in the towel on their marriage. You wouldn’t have guessed it to look at them, but they weren’t the first such couple to come to a Hold Me Tight®️ retreat as a last resort.
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